its just so frustrating
for years, i've followed by the rules
for years, i believed that that is the right thing to do
for years, i've been patient with everyone
everyone whoever teased me, made fun of me, instruct me against my will; everyone...
just fucking everyone..
there's always a limit to everyone's level of tolerance..
well, i guess, tonight, it just hit my maximum..
this would be the second time i feel so fucking pissed within 2 months...
damn, now thats a fucking record
i bet you readers have either no idea what im talking about or just cant be fucking bothered..
well, honestly, i dont care..
this is a fucking blog where you could speak out your ideas, your feelings...
well, here i am..doing just fucking that...
its just one of those days where you just feel pissed 24/7
fuck fuck fuck
im fucking turning 21 this year and still im being treated like a 12 year old..
fucking hell...
im turning legal for god's sake..
ergh
for once, why cant i be like any other adolescent who just do whatever he/she wants..
for once, i question my principles; my priorities..
for once, i just feel like punching non-stop
for once, i just feel like shutting myself up
putting that aside, there's another thing that im just pissed about..
i've been teased since i was a kid
primary school, secondary school, ITE..
even now, and some, even by my own friends..
well, i realise that sometimes, its just a joke to them..
and im fine with it..
but at times, i just feel inferior to them..
with them laughing at me sure reminds me of how pathetic i am..
i feel useless..
i feel weak..
i feel like a coward..
i feel demoralised from it..
furthermore, im not good at quarrelling with words..
and hence, i just shut the fuck up whenever someone either jokingly critisize me or just gave a passing comment about me..
at times, yes, i just see it as a passing remark..
but over time, it adds on..
aku tahu la aku bodoh..
but no need to call me that right?
i know im stupid..
i know i screwed up my olevel's..
but u do not need to remind me of how stupid i am, can?
thank you
thats fucking all..
im just tired with the way everyone's treating me..
fuck
fuck
fuck
ok, im done..
god bless...
fuck you